I always wanted children. My friends and I used to dream up how many we'd have and what their names would be, and I'd declare I'd be the best Mommy ever. As the oldest cousin on both sides (and the older sister), I mommied everything and everybody. I'm sure part of my love of animals comes from that deep urge to nurture. It's almost physical for me. However, as much as I liked babies, it was still hard to deal with a lot of crying when I was babysitting. And in reality, I was a little afraid to be "put out" by having to take care of a child.
Then I turned 24. I remember that year as the year my hormones took over. It must have been gradual, but the realization whooshed in with one sweep. I was at work and heard a newborn cry. You know the one. I had this sudden and debilitating need to find the source of that cry and nurture it away. It was an emotional and physical pull. I had always found that sound plaintive, but never before had I needed to restrain the physical urge to search out and reach for a baby. And it's only gotten worse from there.
For example, have you ever had your uterus twinge with want? I swear I have. It's like that flutter you get in your belly when you're flirting except it's in my uterus. All this reflection was sparked by the fact that I was around possibly the cutest baby animal I've ever experienced in my life today. He was so sweet I wanted to smoosh him. In fact, he was so interactive, trusting and cute and so darn BABY that my uterus nearly exploded.
The Mommy-Need
Update Saturday, February 7, 2009 at 6:54 PM.
Dalam topik musings
Dalam topik musings