For those of you who want to know why I was a little frantic in my need to know how to help E when he was younger, read this and you will see. She describes him pretty much to a T except that he isn't quite as intense as what she describes.. but it's quite close.
High Needs Baby
I like how the writer tries to make you feel good about your "high needs baby. " I know many people have said, "He just sounds like a normal baby!" And while this is true, most babies are pretty needy, he really is a fairly intense case. Even our incredibly kind, understanding and experienced daycare provider struggles with him. Thank God we found her.
I have a bone to pick with people who tell me to "make him independent" as well. He's only gotten more needy with the transition to daycare. I love this paragraph in particular:It helps to see separation from the baby's viewpoint. To most adults, especially those of the "babies must learn to be independent" mindset, baby and mother should be separate persons, able to function on their own. Babies don't see it that way. In their minds, mother is a part of themselves, and they are part of mother. Mother and baby are one, a complete package. These babies feel right when they feel at one with mother; they feel anxious and frightened when not with mother. Adults dub this completely normal behavior as "separation anxiety." In reality, these emotions are normal feelings inside a little person who knows that he needs the presence of his mother to thrive and to feel complete. Labels such as "stranger anxiety" or "separation anxiety" are adult jargon, reflecting our expectations of how we want babies to act for our own convenience, not how babies really are, or what they really need.
In the end, I think it's pretty awesome to have a baby so discerning that he knows Mommy and Daddy are the best. :) And I love that he is so physically lovey. Tiring as it can be, it's also exhilarating.